Skip to main content

Grey is possible if not acceptable!!!!

I asked the question of ' Is grey acceptable' from myself a while ago and found the answers repeatedly within myself. Grey is possible if not acceptable. In most of our human societies, there are lines, circles, limits and even imginations quiet well defined and framed, that even thought of moving beyond seems like a great sin for most of the people. While setting limitations for every human society is important- the same does not have to be judgemental. We are so well trained with our imaginations that the first impression of anything or anyone is judgemental rather than exploration. Someone looks bad, something is wrong , this is not acceptable, how can this even happen, are all phrases of our daily life. We dont try to understand why something is wrong or why someone looks bad - and by the way, what is that 'bad' and how did you know something is 'bad'. If we ask these questions, people think we are insane and have gone crazy, so they quickly label us as outside those circle and the moment ' you are not part of us' then ' you are nothing'. We have taken our lives, our relationships and our surroundings so much for granted based on flawed assumptions of definitive assertions. This is this and that is that, no arguments!!!. And I think we dont even know ourselves because we are lost in the crowd and are so scared to be left behind the crowd because then we would be excluded and - exclusion is destruction, non existence. But have we thought that actually you can find yourself when you are excluded - not by others excluding you, but by your intentions of creating your own terms of exclusion. An exclusion that brings your individual identity to yourself and you are no longer a sheep of the herd.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Feature : Different faces of prostitution in Afghanistan

Prostitution is not an easily accepted reality in our society. Most of the time, we are in denial that in Muslim societies women do not sell their bodies for money, even if they do, no one will buy. It is actually the opposite, even if a woman does not want, the societal miseries make her do anything for survival and livelihood of the family. While Prostitution in many other parts of the world could be understand as a woman's sexual desire and of her immoral character; the truth behind it is hardly explored.
In my work on women's issues in Afghanistan, I came across many women who have at least once sold their bodies to earn a living either forced by a family member or in secret. However, I chose to write about these three women I met three years ago in an old city of Kabul. These three different women have at least one thing in common, that even in a closed traditional and religious society, they were made to be prostitutes, either in public or in secret.
A couple of years ag…

Our voices are not stoned to death!!!

On Friday, 06 July 2012, Ms Fawzia Koofi, one of the prominent female MPs called and with a disturbingly quiet tone asked whether I knew about the Parwan incident. I said Yes, saw a tweet from one of the BBC journalists but dont know if its true or not. She said its true and she saw the video. After we both mourned the incident, she said if women dont stand all these violence, we will all face this fate, one by one. We hanged on the phone and I started digging deeper to find out what happened. 
Though, we still dont know the exact account of the heinous act of violence and oppression that we all witnessed in that video- we are all so shocked & furious over the fact that najiba  was brutally murdered. No matter who did it, that does not make any difference. The information that we have been able to obtain to date is that Najiba, 21 year old who was either kidnapped or forced to come to the house of one of the armed commanders (apparently a taleb as the Parwan governor emphasizes) …

Lal Bibi's journey for justice

Who is Lal Bibi? to those who havent read her story in NYT and other places, I will summarize that Lal Bibi, 21, was abducted, raped & tortured for five consecutive days by the armed men who are incharge of the Afghan Local Police ( an auxilillary militia called Arbakis) in Kunduz during May 2012. She was punished for the animosity that her cousin had with the armed men of ALP. In Afghanistan, a family's 'honor' is tied with a woman of the family and she is punished to account for someone els's deeds...that is a long story.
There is nothing new about this story either. We have rape cases taking place in this part of the world almost every day but what was so strange about Lal Bibi's case was that her whole tribe stood up for her. For whatever reason ( many say its political) but seeing 50 bearded turbaned men who are the village council's head, provincial council's members, tribal leaders, the mosque mullahs and the community members coming to Kabul acc…